Chips y Salsa

I did two of my favorite things this weekend. Saturday afternoon I sat on the patio of a Tex Mex restaurant with a good friend and drank margaritas and ate chips y salsa. The sun was shining and they were playing 80's music. It couldn't have been more fun!

I also went on a great hike in Temescal Canyon. Saw lots of fat lizards and waterfalls. The trees made a green canopy over our heads and sage and eucalyptus were the fragrances of the day.
-Chel

I don't want to live my whole life without ever having been gotten. I want someone to see me, really see ME, to just get me. Know what I mean?
-Chel

2 quarts of oil, 2 flashlights

I just discovered that some punks cut a hole in my car to remove the lock on my passenger side door to get into my car to steal... a yoga mat, 2 quarts of oil, 2 flashlights and 1/2 a gallon of antifreeze. I understand you can make crank or meth or some drug from antifreeze so maybe I'll give them that. But the yoga mat! I'm sure it's wildly popular among thieves to do yoga and there is a big black market somewhere for used yoga mats. Ahimsa! Give me a freakin' brake!
-Chel

A little shakin' going on

I'm looking out the window and suddenly the building shakes as if hit by a stiff breeze. My co-worker blurts out earthquake! Really I say it felt like a stiff breeze to me. What kinda breeze is that? she asks. Well I don't know we have tornados in Texas.

It was an earthquake 3.4 to be exact.
-Chel

Nice Costume...

You too. Except when I dress up as a frigid bitch, I try not to look so constipated.

Bha ha ha! How much do I love Legally Blonde. It was just what I needed tonight. It was a freakin' tough day today.

-Chel

Denial "It ain't just a river in Egypt"

So yesterday as I was leaving for the day I received an email from the acting director asking “Do you think there are things to keep from (the director’s) files?”

One, I wanted to respond Fuck yes, she was the director. Why would you ask that? And Two, I realized I face the task of cleaning out her email and computer files.

This made me sad. Her retirement suddenly got very real. Up until this point I’ve avoided telling people she has retired. I’m in denial waiting for her to come back to work.
-Chel

I'm Okay, You're Okay

I feel okay today. Almost like normal. Well normal for me that is. I don't know how normal that would be for the average person. I'm not sad or angry. Which I'd say is a definite improvement over the last few months.

Dolly, you will be glad to know I don't feel like punching anyone in the face today. :)
-Chel

Apocalypse Now

Prepare yourselves... Today I went into a giant shoe warehouse where all shoes were on sale and I left without purchasing a single pair. I know, it is the beginning of the end.
-Chel

The Devil wears Prada

and now apparently so do I. Baha ha ha ha ha! (insert evil laugh here)
-Chel

Happiness is...

a new battery for the vibrator.

Ahimsa (non-violence)

Last night was truly horrible.

The Whore was at yoga. After class I confronted her. I asked her why she was there? I said do you know how much pain you've caused me, how it makes me feel to see you here. Do you know what she said to me? "I didn't think you thought it was a big deal." NOT A BIG DEAL! I said you've been fucking him for over a year. "Well, I didn't realize you were so upset." I said out of respect for me and for what you've done, don't come back to class. Take another class. Then I added that I hoped to God that she would one day have the opportunity to experience the pain she had caused me. She said "Thank you."

How is it possible that I am in the worst pain, pain that she is in part responsible for and she is so utterly insensitive and clueless? What kind of person is she? If I were fucking someone's boyfriend for a year I would think it was a very big deal and know that I was causing pain to another person. WTF?

By the time I got to the car I was so upset I was hysterical. I called The Boy. I tried really hard to maintain. But I ended up leaving two hysterical messages on his voicemail - asking him how she could have possibly got the idea that this situation was no big deal. From him?

When I got home The Boy called and was rewarded with brunt of my anger. We ended up talking and crying for over an hour. No, nothing has changed. We are both sorry things ended this way and he'll make sure The Whore does not come back to class.
-Chel

Semblance of Calm

Once again I've managed to wrestle my to do list into a semblance of calm, deal with the crises and freaks of the day to make it to 5pm.

Now that work has slowed down I'm forced to think about The Whore being in my yoga class tonight. I want to call The Boy to ask him if his "lover" dropped the class. But I don't want to speak to The Boy. I can't believe that she would be so disrespectful as to continue the class. But then she did fuck my boyfriend so what's to stop her from coming to yoga. I don't want to speak to The Whore either but I've worked out what I want to say if she is there. Most of all I just want her to go away.

Lunch

So I had lunch at one of those vegan/vegetarian cafes. Dude, I had the veggie burger. Bleck! And it cost me $9.00. The only reason I go there at all is if I'm having lunch with Jeff.

I'm all for cutting back on meat. I'm a huge fan of organic and free range. I love me some farmer's market produce. But I just can't do vegan.

I'm eating gummy worms to get rid of the veggie burger taste. Yes, gummy worms that contain gelatin. Probably made from the bones of some poor unsuspecting cow.
-Chel

Dirty, Dirty, Dirty!

At work this afternoon, in my office.
Girlfriend - Do you know what a "Dirty Sanchez" is?
Me - No. What is the context?
GF- I'm not sure. It is sexual. I thought I'd ask you since you know all that stuff.
Me - ...

Needless to say curiosity overwhelmed us and we googled it. And let me tell you it is not nice. No really. It. Is. Not. Nice. Not to mention completely unsanitary. Go to http://www.urbandictionary.com/ and look it up for yourselves. But don't pretend I didn't warn you.
-Chel

Crush

I have a crush on a man I haven't said more than 10 words to over the past 3 years. Our paths cross in the parking garage, we come and go at the same time exchanging hellos. I know very little about him for certain only that his name is Angel and he wears thongs... a red one. I've made up a whole life for him in my head.
-Chel